Cheap Beer: Introducing My Dating Profile and the Pick Six

Hey Beer Drinkers,

It’s hard out there for a good-looking chicken like myself. I just can’t seem to find true love! So I did what most people do…turned my fate over to the power of the Internet!

Below is the ad I posted:

Young, attractive chicken in search of mixed beer selection (St. Louis)
• Age: Need all my feathers to count
• Body: Feathered
• Height: 5’8
• Status: Single

Hi. I am not your everyday, human sized chicken! I am a professional, who is always on the go and needs a beer to fit my particular tastes and needs. I’m not going to lie, I’ve been around the block a few times. I’ve dated some beers for a long time, but I can never commit for the long term. Since I understand that is not going to change, I am seeking a beer that lets me mix and match what I like.

If this sounds interesting, please send pics and a message.

When I hit send….it was liberating…I had a good feel about this. Then I received my first response to the ad…it was from the head keeper. (I guess he was also on the site!)

Subject: This is your boss. Stop posting personal ads.

I read your personal ad. I must say, your chicken scratch is much better than I expected! Anyways, we have “the Pick-a-Six” sampler pack at most Dirt Cheap locations. For only $7.99, you can pick from a wide variety of craft and local beers and create your pack. We have you covered.

Please pull down this ad…and the one from last week seeking a stunt double. It’s not going to happen.


I took this message with great excitement and some disappointment. Yes, you won’t see a chicken flying through a flaming hoop in the next commercial, but you can get a custom six pack at participating Dirt Cheap locations!

Next time you are at the store, ask about the Pick-a-Six program. Currently they are available at these fine locations:

• Fenton
• Telegraph
• Dunn Road
• St. Charles
• Affton
• West Alton
• Hwy K
• Kisker
• Desloge
• Cape Girardeau
• Hannibal
• Ballwin

The beer selection for the Pick-a-Six is always changing, so keep an eye on this section. Plus, we really pride ourselves on helping you discover new products and finding exactly what you want. It’s all part of the fun, fun!

Now that we have figured out this Pick-a-Six dilemma, feel free to take a CluckBuck on me! This will help save on your next trip to Dirt Cheap!

Your favorite party fowl,
The Dirt Cheap Chicken